I have a little trick I use when anxiety starts whispering (or sometimes shouting) that I can’t do something. It’s simple but effective:

Act as if.

Instead of waiting until I feel confident, I just go ahead and act like I am. My thoughts can be stubborn—like a toddler refusing to clean up their toys—so I use my actions like a sledgehammer to break through the mental resistance.

See, I get that thoughts fuel feelings, and feelings drive actions. But sometimes, I have to flip the script and let my actions lead the way.

There’s a lot in life I don’t feel like doing:

• Relationships – Staying connected takes effort, and sometimes I’d rather stay in my bubble.
• Exercise – My brain loves to tell me, You’re too old for this nonsense!
• Big challenges – Self-doubt loves to creep in, making me question if I have what it takes.

But if I act as if I’m the kind of person who stays connected, exercises, or takes on big challenges, guess what? More often than not, things turn out just fine.

Does This Actually Work? Science Says Yes.

Turns out, this isn’t just a personal life hack—it’s backed by some psychology. The concept is called “behavioral activation,” and it’s often used in therapy to help people break out of negative thought cycles. When you take action, even when you don’t feel like it, your brain starts to adjust. Your mind sees your behavior and thinks, Oh, I guess we’re doing this now. Cool.

So next time anxiety tries to talk me out of something, I remind myself: Act as if.
Not in a fake-it-till-you-make-it way, but in a train-your-brain-to-get-on-board kind of way.

And most of the time, it works.